Mothers really do favour their 'precious first borns' over the children they have later, research has found.
Among examples of attention lavished on the 'precious first borns' (PFBs) were tales of how mothers rubbed shampoo into their own eyes before using it on their baby to ensure it wouldn't sting, and pulling their prams backwards for miles to keep the sun off their adored offspring.
While they will conscientiously disinfect everything that comes into contact with their PFB and change them up to 150 times a week, their later children have to make do with items licked clean by the dog and stew in their own juices until their parents are ready to deal with them.
The term PFB and its poorer sibling the Neglected Subsequent Children (NSCs) were coined by members of the parenting website Mumsnet.
Among the tales reported was one of a mother that used a hairdryer on her baby's bottom after changing her.
"She was chatting to her neighbour and asked if they were ever disturbed by her crying,"
"The neighbour assured her they were not, but that they had been woken once or twice by what sounded like a hairdryer."
Another self-obsessed mother turned down an invitation to a friend and her baby's christening party because she thought her own child's "total gorgeousness would show their baby up and make them feel bad".
Another confirmed the differing hygiene practices used for Child One and Two, saying: "First child, suckable items must be sterilised in Milton or steam after they've dropped on the floor. Second child: items must be wiped over with a clean damp cloth.
"Third child: give them to the dog to lick clean."
Justine Roberts, co-founder of Mumsnet, told the reporters that most mothers would agree they treated the first child differently to later children.
"Precious First Born syndrome is something we can all relate to – most mums will confess to having checked on their sound asleep firstborns several times a night, whilst Neglected Subsequent Children are liable to bawl for an age before we even notice," she said.
最新研究表明,媽媽確實(shí)偏愛(ài)長(zhǎng)子長(zhǎng)女。
有很多例子可以證明媽媽對(duì)"寶貝老大"所付出的極度關(guān)愛(ài),例如在給寶寶擦洗發(fā)水前,為確保不刺激皮膚,媽媽會(huì)先擦一些在自己眼睛上。為了自己可愛(ài)的寶貝不被太陽(yáng)曬到,媽媽還會(huì)倒推嬰兒車(chē)數(shù)英里。
媽媽會(huì)將老大能摸到的每樣物品都認(rèn)真消毒,每周更換尿片高達(dá)150次。但對(duì)待老小們,只要是狗舔干凈的東西就行,在父母有空理他們之前,只能自己受著。
PFB(寶貝老大)和可憐的弟弟妹妹即"被忽略的老小"(NSCs)這兩種說(shuō)法是育兒網(wǎng)站"Mumsnet"的成員創(chuàng)造的。
在眾多例子中據(jù)說(shuō)有這樣一個(gè)故事,講的是一位媽媽在給寶寶換尿布以后用吹風(fēng)機(jī)把她的屁股吹干。
"她當(dāng)時(shí)在和鄰居聊天,問(wèn)他們有沒(méi)有被寶寶的哭聲打擾。"
"鄰居們很肯定地告訴她沒(méi)有,但卻被聽(tīng)著像吹風(fēng)機(jī)的聲音吵醒過(guò)一兩次。"
另一位"自戀"的媽媽拒絕了朋友的邀請(qǐng),不去參加朋友寶寶的洗禮儀式,因?yàn)樗X(jué)得自己的孩子"太耀眼了,會(huì)把別人的孩子比下去,讓他們感覺(jué)難堪。"
另一句話則印證了媽媽對(duì)老大和老小的衛(wèi)生保健也不同,"老大吮吸的東西掉到地上之后都要用米頓消毒液或者蒸汽殺菌,而老二的用干凈的濕布擦擦就行了。"
"至于老三么,讓狗把臟東西舔干凈就可以了。"
"Mumsnet"的合作創(chuàng)始人賈斯。苛_伯茨在接受記者采訪時(shí)稱(chēng),大多數(shù)媽媽都承認(rèn)自己對(duì)老大和老小的態(tài)度不同。
她說(shuō):"很多現(xiàn)象都與'寶貝老大'這種情結(jié)有關(guān)。大多數(shù)母親坦稱(chēng)在老大睡覺(jué)時(shí),會(huì)每天起夜數(shù)次看寶寶是不是睡得香,而'被忽略的老小'則要喊很久,我們才會(huì)注意到。"